I love walking around alone. I love to WANDER.
Other people? Not so much. They set out to walk somewhere and then turn around and go back. And to talk and talk and talk along the way.
Other people like to keep going. Other people don’t look at what’s around us, don’t hear.
People don’t like it when you want to stop suddenly on a walk and just LOOK. Just STAND there. Not saying anything. For who-knows-how-long. Or maybe just squealing The TRAIN! The train!! Look at THE TRAIN!!!
No.
Other people want to keep walking. Other people want to keep talking. They don’t like it when you hear something while they’re talking and you’re trying not to trip trying to casually match your steps and squeeze onto the sidewalk with them and make room for other people and none of these other people are trying to make room and I don’t know what would happen if I didn’t because almost nobody seems to budge from their trajectory so what would happen if I didn’t fall behind or leap over to the edge on the other side of the tree planters and my mom keeps talking while I’m trying to do this.
The train was idling (is that what it’s called when a train is “on” but not moving?) and making so many amazing sounds I just wanted to stop and listen and stop and record them and then move a few feet and listen and record from a different angle a whole other blanket of sounds but I knew she was only going to feign patience with this for a few seconds.
I allowed myself thirty seconds of video and then I knew I had to stop she wanted to keep going and talking and I could have stayed here for a long time or at least five minutes but you can really only do that freely when you’re alone.
I’m always walking too fast for other people or stopping too long or “interrupting” to stop and drink in something beautiful and they don’t see it they don’t know what I’m looking at they don’t think it’s worth stopping for but I’m not stopping I’m HERE this is what I came for this is what I’m doing I’m noticing something I didn’t plan on a squirrel a train a snail that needs help across the road. A smell asking us to look where its coming from a sudden shift of temperature the moment you step into the sun or an eerie channel of cool wind.
Where is it coming from? Let’s stop and feel for it.
But they don’t feel anything.